A good laugh: Fruits? No, thanks

May 29, 2017

By Eddy Montilla.

Explanatory Note: The following joke is a made-up story by the author with the sole purpose of providing fun for the readers. Therefore, it does not have the slightest intention of making fun of people for their sexual orientation.

40 years later after their last meeting, some friends are at a bar bragging about how strong they were as womanizer.

“When I was young, I had as many women as grapes you can count in a bunch.” A man said.

“Well, I had as many girls as bananas you can see in a bunch.” The oldest of the group replied.

“And how about you, Frank? They asked a tall and lanky man, well known for his effeminacy.

“Me? He said with girlish voice. “I don’t like fruits!!”

Copyright 2017 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.

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A good laugh: Food in the desert

March 27, 2017

By Eddy Montilla.

Explanatory Note: The following joke is a made-up story by the author with the sole purpose of providing fun for the readers. Therefore, it does not have the slightest intention of making fun of any person who could suffer from mental illness or making fun of any person for his or her religious convictions.

Two men have been walking for days in the middle of the desert without food. Suddenly, one of them breaks into a run and whoops for joy. “Hey, Brad, look! It is bread, like manna in the desert!”

”You are officially crazy, Tom. Manna was white and that’s almost black. Now, stop eating the camel dung and run faster to try to catch it.

Copyright 2017 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.


A good laugh: Unwanted kisses

August 5, 2016

By Eddy Montilla.

PLUMBER

A man staggers into his house and says: “You look so beautiful, sweetheart! Let me kiss all these moles you have on your thin arms one by one!!”

“Three things tell me that you are blind drunk, sir. First, I’m not your wife; I am a plumber. Second, “these thin arms” are two plungers to unblock your toilet and third, I had never seen a man kissing his own sh..t so happily!!”

Copyright 2016 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.


A good laugh: Like father, like son

July 5, 2016

By Eddy Montilla.

DONKEY

One day, the lion got all animals with their young together and told them: “We are getting old and going through a difficult time. We need the best of our children.”

“I am good at making holes.” The baby mole said and other animals clapped.

“I am good at climbing trees for food.” The baby monkey said. And so did other young animals about their skills.

“Say something, as…hole!”, a donkey said to his son.

“I am good at being stupid!!”

“That’s my boy!!”

Copyright 2016 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.


A good laugh: Keeping burglars away

April 4, 2016

By Eddy Montilla.

MIRROR

“Mark, burglars don’t give me a moment’s peace.”

“I had the same problem, Fred, but now I can even sleep with the door wide open.”

“How did you get it?”

“Very simple. I just put a sign in front of my house: To burglars: I have all the fences around his home electrified with high voltage, a pit bull is always behind the door and my wife’s face is uglier than hell. Believe me, if the first two things do not kill you, the third one will do.”

Copyright 2016 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.


A Good Laugh: “Heaven? No, thanks”

February 10, 2016

By Eddy Montilla.

HEAVEN-HELL

Explanatory Note: The following joke is a made-up story by the author with the sole purpose of providing fun for the readers. Therefore, it does not have the slightest intention of making fun of any person who could suffer from mental illness or making fun of any person for his or her religious convictions.

Two madmen are digging the backyard of a mental hospital.

“Hey, Ben. You need a doctor. I think you are crazy.” Ben’s friend said. “First you told me that we were going to Heaven and now you have decided to go to Hell.”

“Believe me, Frank. I know what I am doing. These people up there are not good.”

Just at that moment, it started to rain cats and dogs.

Can you see, Frank? Now they are pissing on us! Keep digging quickly before they decide to shit!!

Copyright 2016 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.


A good laugh: The angry husband

January 29, 2016

By Eddy Montilla.

GRUMPY-HUSBAND

A man leaves home after a horrible quarrel with his wife. At office, he was soundly scolded by his boss and, on his way home, he ran into a tree. While having dinner, the man looked at her wife out of the corner of his eye and muttered to himself:

“What a miserable and fuc…ing life! Outside problems and more problems. And inside, a disheveled and grumpy woman who wants me to pull out a tooth with this tough meat!”

The woman, still hot about the quarrel, approaches him with a hot frying pan: “What did you say?”

“I, I, I just said nobody can beat you cooking beef!”

Copyright 2016 littlethingsforall.wordpress.com. All rights are reserved.